November 14th, 2011

Dark side

Watched Victor Victoria again today. That was fun!

"We are now reaching an altitude of 2500 feet, or 762 meters. To your right you can see one of the last active volcanoes of the region. Don't be alarmed though – the last time it had erupted was over a century ago. At present a lake has formed in its mouth, and there are several establishments that can allow you to access the highly sulfuric water and mud in a manner that is both safe and beneficial to your health. The ridges that you see all around the Mountain had been formed from the Lava that had come from the volcano when it had last erupted, or maybe even before that, when it was still active. But as you can see from the thick vegetation growing at the sides of the mountain – it is all perfectly safe.
Now, if you look further out to your right, almost at the horizon, you might be able to see a glimpse of the ocean..."
Kate Mulgrew


(Melancholy, By Drummer Photo Experience)

I admit that I have cheated today. This photo was the closest to sought out that I could get without going through my personal pic folders. I wanted a picture that would capture 'melancholy'. Coming to think of it, I might have a better shot, taken by my beloved Canadian. But this is not the point.
A friend and I stopped by an old workplace today and I got to see someone whom I used to care greatly about.
Seeing him now is just painful. I was an idiot. I know this and I admit to it without any second thoughts or... whatever… because I was. I was an idiot and I paid for my mistakes.
Logic-ing my way around this mess isn't and hasn't been helping though since my guilt isn't about what transpired, but more over the ramifications of those actions.
I know I'm being vague.
But now, seeing him, I knew that this is something that could never be again – our friendship. That friendship was lost inside the lies. And even if they are ever "aired out", then this friendship won't be repaired. Especially if the lies are ever discovered as what they truly are – our friendship is lost.
So – Melancholy.
Perhaps a little gloomy... And the down pour, complete with the occasional thunder clap (not that I'm complaining, but this is odd, odd weather...), is not helping my mood. Especially since it soaked me to the bone on the way back home. Thank the gods for raincoats though. Only about a third of my body was soaked to the bone.
Now, to bed I think. It's time I went to bed before midnight...